Today I would like to speak about my hyperactivity. In the beginning I introduced myself and I mentioned that I am a clearly hyperactive. I belong to the first generation of hyperactive persons. In the time when people did not know for which reason these children were different than the others. A lot of people from my family and my teachers probably asked themselves many times: what the hell is wrong with these kids?!
I was and I will always be in love with moving. At that time I was climbing on trees, hanging head down from big branches and run as much I could. I believe dance was my first language. It was so easy, simple and true for me. Some days I still think that I could explain myself much better if I would show it with dance movements. Music and dance were very connected for me from the beginning. I am also a good musician with an excellent hearing. When I was 3-4 years old I spoke already 2-3 languages which is pretty good for this age. I was walking with the age of 1 and I was toilet clean with 15 month. But…I had a lot of trouble in the school. First of all I was really bored in the kindergarten. I loved to go there and socialize but with the age of 3 I want to learn letters and numbers. Everybody said this is not normal; I need to play like the other children and enjoy my childhood. But I was still bored so I was doing some crazy staff to not be bored. At those times punishment in pedagogical institutions (Hungary) was allowed so I was standing many hours in the corner or I was not allowed to go out and run with the other children. What happened? I got more hyperactive and crazier than before and nobody could handle me. Finally I was really happy to go to school but I had a lot of trouble sitting 6-7X 45 min in a cold and agley classroom with a teacher who really hated me and looked like a burned out witch. Because my brain is much faster than usually other people´s I got easily board in the class as well…so I got a lot of punishment again. My teachers thought I am stupid because I had bad notes in my classes and I was much more interested in music, dance and running. They even want to put me in a special school for handicap children. Crazy I know, today I just laugh of them and I am truly sorry that they were so unable to see through me.
My troubles continued also later. My parents took me with their best will to a specialist who did with me a lot of tests. It turned out that I am not stupid, I am actually pretty smart and have a much higher IQ than normal people do. LOL!!! But still the specialist gave me RITALIN in order to adapt and perform well in the system and get good notes because it was important if I want to apply to university. So I took Ritalin for 2 years and I hated it. It made me calm, and I totally lost my connection with my inner self and I stopped to dream. My notes got much better and I had finally some positive feedbacks about my brain and my capacity in the system. But I was unhappy and got in depression. I had two break downs in this 2 years when I was only 16-17 years old. One of my break downs was pretty intense. I started to cry and I couldn´t stop for 3 days. My parents had to take me home from the boarding school to calm me down. Then I decided to stop taking Ritalin. My poor parents felt very bad about Ritalin but I don´t blame them, they just want the best for me to help me to fit in the system. Here the only to blame is the system which took me as a fool.
Nowadays it is proven that Ritalin is a drug. It makes children and young people more calm and more capable for the system, BUT many of them get addicted to other drugs and alcohol.
Many think Ritalin (methylphenidate) is safe, or mild, because so many children use it. However, the government classifies the psychoactive drug with cocaine and morphine because it is highly addictive (http://ritalinsideeffects.net/ ).